anaheim-gazette 1951-10-05

ALFRED 6 Anaheim Gazette OAKY DOAKS FATSO! WHATCHA EATIN'? SCRAM, BURPIE! IVE GOT SOME TAFFY! TAFFY?! YUM! SCORCHY SMITH I REALLY THINK YOU've GOT A CLUE HERE, MAJOR! AND IT SHOULD BE PRESERVED FOR EVidence BUT HOW CAN YOU MOVE FRAGILE CIGAR ASHES? MMM...COAT IT WITH FABRIC "DOPE" THROUGH A SPRAY GUN. SCORCHY SMITH I REALLY THINK YOU'VE GOT A CLUE HERE, MAJOR! AND IT SHOULD BE PRESERVED FOR EVIDENCE BUT HOW CAN YOU MOVE FRAGILE CIGAR ASHES? MMM...COAT IT WITH FABRIC "DOPE" THROUGH A SPRAY GUN! DICKIE DARE SO WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR BOAT IS SINKING? YOU KEEP THAT DINNER DATE WITH DAWY JONES! THAT WAS A JAM, SIR! BUT OF COURSE SOME BOAT CAME RIPPLING ALONG IN THE VERY NICK OF... NO BOAT OR A FIX LEAKS! NO D PRESERVERS! 25 OFF LAND! YOU'R SMART...HOW COME I'M HERE, QUIZ KID? THE ADVENTURES OF PATSY CREEP, TUNE IN THAT FIT AS FITTLE" DOLL! IF SHE SAWS I NEED TO TRIM DOWN, I TRIM DOWN! GATHER ROUND YOU HEFTIES! LET'S START PEELING THE POUNDS WITH A FEW FAST BENDS READY! AND NOW, ARMS OVER HEAD LET'S ROLL FORWARD BACKWARD ROLL TO THE RIGHT ROLL TO THE LEFT ROLL ROLL OH, DIANA! ...DINNER IS READY, DIANA! I DON'T WANT ANY DINNER, MOTHER... HI, BILLY!!! THE SCHOOL DANCE AT TOMORROW NIGHT, P. WHY, I'D LOVE IT!!! ETC-ETC- JEEPERS, M DO WE EAT FAMIS ...DINNER IS READY DIANA! I DON'T WANT ANY DINNER, MOTHER... R.R.I.N.A! HI, BILLY!!! THE SCHOOL DANCE AT TOMORROW NIGHT? WHY, I'D LOVE IT!!! ETC-ETC--- JEEPERS, DO WE EAT FAMIS THE GOVERNOR SAYS... OUR HOMES ARE SAFE... THE DAM WILL GO IN AT LEAST TWO MILES UP THE STREAM ABOVE OUR TOWN!! HURRAY! HURRAY FOR THE GOVERNOR HURRAY FOR PETERS OH PETERS! SCOTT CHENWATER'S NEFARIOUS PLAN IS DEFINITELY NIPPED!! THE HAPPY NEWS BLANKETED THE TOWN IN A MATTER OF MINUTES! BUSINESS CAME TO A PIANDSTILL... IT WAS A ROMAN HOLIDAY IN PETERS CORNER! aheim Gazette FRIDAY, OCTOBER 5, 1931 ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA BALLROOM LA BALLROOM 50 COPYRIGHT THE MICHAEL NEWSPAPER SYNDICATION AN, CMON, ALFRED... BAR MANILA MIDWAY 10¢ YUM! YOU CARRY ON WITH YER AFFAIRS O' STATE, AN' I'll Carry On With This! BURPIE! THAT'S MY TAFFY! BOTH FATHER AND MOTHER HAVE A SWEET TOOTH, SIR OAKY! EVERYBODY IN THIS KINGDOM MUST HAVE A SWEET TOOTH, THEY'RE ALL SO FAT! EXCELLENT! AND THE DRIED SHELLAC WILL PRESERVE THE ASHES INTACT! NOW WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF MY DISCOVERY? LABEL'S BURNED OFF! BUT IT SURE LOOKS LIKE A BENZOL CAN, GENERAL! DID YOU FIND THE CAP TOO? THE CAP WAS PROBABLY BLOWN OFF WHEN THE FLUID EXPLODED! OAT IT MIC 'DOPE' A SPRAY EXCELLENT! AND THE DRIED SHELLAC WILL PRESERVE THE ASHES INTACT! NOW WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF MY DISCOVERY? LABEL'S BURNED OFF! BUT IT SURE LOOKS LIKE A BENZOL CAN, GENERAL! DID YOU FIND THE CAP TOO? THE CAP WAS PROBABLY BLOWN OFF WHEN THE FLUID EXPLODED! NO BOAT OR AIRPLANE CAME! COULDN'T FIX LEAKS! NO DINGHY OR PRESERVERS! 25 MILES OFF LAND! YOU'RE SO SMART...HOW COME I'M HERE, QUIZ KID? LET ME CHECK! YOUR BOAT WAS SINKING... PUMP SHOT... NO SAFETY STUFF ABOARD... COULDN'T FIX LEAKS OR SWIM... NO ROWBOAT, AND NO OTHER CRAFT OR PLANE CAME! NIGHT COMING ON, WIND PIPING UP... ARMS OVER HEAD ROLL FORWARD... ROLL TO ROLL TO THE ROLL ROLL NOW THAT WEIVE LOOSENED UP THE MUSCLES, LET'S START THE EXERCISES! CREEP! GET ME AN ASPIRIN! AND INSTEAD OF DIPPING INTO THE WHIPPED CREAM DIP INTO ONE OF THESE! CLESS, YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT PATCH, MAYBE THE MY SHERT WILL CLOCK UP AGAIN! JEEPERS, MOTHER! WHEN DO WE EAT? I'M SIMPLY FAMISHED!!! 8 P.M. 9 P.M. 10 P.M. SODA SHOPP JEEPERS, MOTHER! WHEN DO WE EAT? I'M SIMPLY FAMISHED!!! THE CHURCH BELLS THE FIRE BELLS RINGING...HORNS ARE BLOWING AND THEY WON'T STOP TILL THAT SCOUNDREL SCOTT CHENWATER AND HIS GANG OF CHISLERS GET OUT OF TOWN!! THEY'RE BEATEN AND THEY MIGHT AS WELL SCRAM BEFORE WE CHASE 'EM OUT O' TOWN AGAIN! THE TOWNSFOLK WERE WORN OUT FROM CELEBRATING, BUT THEY ALL WAITED UP TO SHOUT A ROARING FINALE" AT SCOTT AS HE DROVE OUT OF TOWN, NEVER TO RETURN. WE HOPE! MANILA MIDWAY THE ZOOM-A-RIDE MY GOODNESS! Carl Ryman Den McLure 10-0 EVERYBODY IN THIS KINGDOM MUST HAVE A SWEET TOOTH, THEY'RE ALL SO FAT! THAT IS, EVERYBODY EXCEPT YOU! SIR OAKY! I LIKE YOU TOO! YOU'RE SO NICE AND--AND SPINDLY! THE CAP WAS PROBABLY BLOWN OFF WHEN THE FLUID EXPLODED! TO BE BLOWN OFF, THE CAP WOULD HAVE TO BE ON THE CAN! BUT IF IT WAS ON THE CAN, HOW COULD THE BENZOL GET IGNITED!? A MOST AMAZING YOUNG MAN, EH MAJOR? EH? HAK-SNORT-HEH! HEH AMERICAN LADS ARE VERY SHARP GENERAL! THE CAP WAS PROBABLY BLOWN OFF WHEN THE PLUUD EXPLODED! TO BE BLOWN OFF, THE CAP? WOULD HAVE TO BE ON THE CAN! BUT IF IT WAS ON THE CAN HOW COULD THE BENZOL GET IGNITED?!? A MOST AMAZING YOUNG MAN, EH MAJOR? EH? HAK-SNORT-HEH, HEH AMERICAN LADS ARE VERY SHARP GENERAL! T FIX LEAKS OR NO ROWBOAT, AND ER CRAFT OR PLANE NIGHT COMING ON, WIND PIPING UP... COULON WAUGH 15 MINUTES DEAD SILENCE MEY, OF COURSE! MIGOSH THAT'S SIMPLE WHEN YOU SEE IT! DC YOU SEE IT? THAT EXECUTE STUFF IDLL A FAKE MACHER! NOT CAN RUN YOUR HEART! MAKBE WHAT I NEED, CREEP IS A LITTLE SPECIAL INDIVIDUAL ATTENTION FROM MISS FITTLE! 10 P.M. 11 P.M. TELL ME, TUBBY—JUST FOR MY OWN INFORMATION—DID YOU HAVE ANY MONEY WITH YOU AT ALL TONIGHT? I'VE GOT TO EAT UP EVERYTHING IN THE HOUSE TODAY SO I CAN START DIETING TOMORROW!