oc-plain-dealer 1923-10-23

EDITORIAL AND FEATURES An Independent Newspaper Issued Every Afternoon Except Sunday Paul V. Hester Editor and Publisher Daily Greeting To Our Readers The Savior suffers when His children slide; Then is His holy name by men blasphemed; And He afresh is mocked and crucified. Even by those His bitter death redeemed. —Edmeston. AMERICAN LEGION FOR AMERICANISM That for which men proffer their lives, in willing sacrifice if need be, must be precious. Members of the American Legion were ready, in 1917 and 1918, to lay their lives upon the altar of country and its ideals. Their love of country is not open to question. Patriotism with them is sincere and unadulterated. In the national convention of the American Legion at San Francisco the spirit of Americanism is rife. The sincerity of the Legion's aims is not to be questioned. That this great organization has been, is, and will continue to be a tremendous power for the suppression of anti-American tendencies, is not doubted. Its patriotic services will be of inestimable value, as have been and are the patriotism-fostering works of the Grand Army of the Republic and the Spanish-American war veterans. It is well indeed to have these salutary influences at work to counteract the insidious anti-Americanism which comes under high-sounding names and euphonious phrases to full and to deceive the people. David Lloyd George will have reason always to remember with gratification his ovalional welcome in this country. MAKES ELOQUENT PLEAS FOR DEMOCRACY A wave of autocracy is sweeping across the world, warns David Lloyd George. He summons America, Britain and France MAKES ELOQUENT PLEAS FOR DEMOCRACY A wave of autocracy is sweeping across the world, warns David Lloyd George. He summons America, Britain and France to stand by the colors of democracy and thrust back this threatening tide of autocracy and assumption of dictatorial powers. In several countries of Europe dictatorships exist already and in others this ominous step is contemplated. Lloyd George, in his Chicago speech, paid eloquent tribute to democracy as a governmental system. "Democratic institutions alone can produce and train men that are able to appeal to nations, to rise to those heights of sacrifice which are the last citidels of freedom in all lands." Pleas for the sustaining of democracy fall in fertile soil in this land. This is a thoroughly democratic people. And yet, even in this favored land, there are tendencies which threaten the security of democratic institutions. There is apathy and indifference on the part of vast numbers of responsible men and women toward all things political. This in itself—this abstention from voting, by millions of eligible electors—is a grave menace to democracy. The world reveres Abraham Lincoln as one of the immortals. Europe is paying the penalty for its dreadful indulgence in militarism. Every destructive flood argues for scientific control of flood waters. In his palmy days there was no shrewder political leader on earth than David Lloyd George. The movements against crime in this state should go on and on, until California becomes the nation's "white spot" for lawlessness, orderliness and security of life and property. "SUDDEN SERVICE" FOR EVERY USE In Buying GANAHL-GRIM Lumber for any purpose—much or little of it—you may know that your dollar is FOR EVERY USE In Buying GANAHL-GRIM Lumber for any purpose—much or little of it—you may know that your dollar is buying you all that it possibly can get in Lumber value—anywhere. Also your dollar's worth of service with it. Ganahl-Grim Lumber Co. 501 E. CENTER ST. PHONE 38 FREE PLANS AND BUILDING INFORMATION BRICK COMMON AND FACE IN LIGHT GRAY COLOR, CAPACITY 40,000 PER DAY Brickmon, Plaster and Concrete Sand—Day or Night Service Factory located, La Palma and West Streets. One Block South of Fullerton Water Plant Orange County Brick & Tile Co. Inc. Phone—Anaheim 995 ES Sunday Publisher THE ORANGE COUNTY Plain Dealer TUESDAY Subscription R Entered at the Raiding The Farmers For Hallowe'en Party Decorations GET A NICE RIPE ONE FOR PIE TOO JIMTH' FARMER WONT CARE-THERE'S LOTS MORE LEFT! ISN'T THIS THRILLING! I WANT TWO DIG ONES FOR JACK'LANTERN' TO PUT ON THE FRONT GATE POSTS! HEY-BRING A BASKET-THERE'S BUSHELS OF NUTS OVER HERE! NO WRESSPRESSING DETOUR I MIGHT AS WELL GET ENOUGH TO DECORATE MY STORE WINDOW TOO WHILE I'M AT IT! PARAGRAPHS The most successful fiction of the season is the line: "Played by the original New York cast." If Mr. Burbank isn't busy now, he might devise some safe way to cross a wire fence with a shot-gun. Another way to avoid high blood pressure is to refrain from helping little Willie with his lessons. A good neighborhood is one inhabited by people who are willing to pay more rent than they can afford. The kind of people who tell all they know, wouldn't occupy the stage long if they would stop at that. Hope is the quality that persuades you to leave the old car unlocked and trust to the insurance company. If woman has reasoning power, why does she think a No. 6 will look as dainty as the No. 2 displayed in the window? The strike is an excellent weapon, no doubt; but there are so few moderns who can handle a boomerang. Governments still use propaganda, but all the clever liars seem to have gone back into private enterprises. The peacemaker isn't the only one who has great reward for ABE MARTIN DINNER STORIES Old Captain Callahan, fat and contented, was smoking on his gallery, says Judge. He said: "I had a time with them fine heng that kept scratchin' up my flower beds last week. They belong to my wife and I didn't want to kill 'em. I finally cropped t help wings, and that held 'em all in the chicken yard, except one infernal old hen. "That old devil was restless, and full of feminism; she would not stay in the home yard, and she was always trying to git into something or to go somewhere. I cropped her wings every night, the last time plumb to the bone, but she'd git over the hen yard fence anyhow. With her disposition and character, there just simply wasn't no ordinary way to keep her from ruining flower beds. "While my wife was gone to a millinary opening, I got to thinking about my bachelor days when I used to keep game cocks. I hunted up an old pair of steel gaffs, or false spurs, which you could put on a young rooster so, he could whip an older one—the psychology of it being that he could learn all the fighting tricks without ever getting his courage unsettled by defeat. "I fastened them steel spurs to the ankles of that fool restless hea, pointing backwards and downwards right behind her heels, and set kind o' digging fashion, and turned her loose. The durned old wretch was hen-minded and therefore she made straight for the flower beds, but every time she'd scratch, them spurs would stick in the ground and cause her to step forward and she'd walk" SUNSHINE PELLETS BY DR. W. F. THOMSON The marsh is white with hoar frost. The "skeeter's" song is stilled; No danger now of aches and of shakes. The frost the "skeeter" killed. If woman has reasoning power, why does she think a No. 6 will look as dainty as the No. 2 displayed in the window? The strike is an excellent weapon, no doubt; but there are so few moderns who can handle a boomerang. Governments still use propaganda, but all the clever liars seem to have gone back into private enterprises. The peacemaker isn't the only one who has great reward for smoothing things down. There's the plasterer. If Mussolini uses a typewriter, there is little doubt about which one of the capital letters shows the most wear. A European celebrity, being besieged by American newspaper men, must wonder in his heart if he really is that great. When the book agent begins by saying the work is offered only to the cultured few, he need only point out the dotted line. "You can tell whether a man is a fighter by feeling of his head." This is especially true if you feel of it with a chair. If a man scolds because this is a commercial age, you know he came out of his last battle with his purse considerably flattened. We shall not believe in the sincerity of the Bok peace prize contestants until we hear what the losers say about the committee. At this season every normal boy wishes to be carried from the field, happy in the knowledge that the team will be ruined without him. If we really are short of distance runners for the Olympic games, why not try the suburbanites who live "only three minutes from a car line?" Correct this sentence: "Well, it's my affair," he declared, "and I don't care what the public thinks about it." SUNSHINE PELLETS BY DR. W. F. THOMSON The marsh is white with hoar frost. The "skeeter's" song is stilled; No danger now of aches and of shakes. The frost the "skeeter" killed. Pest houses, whipping posts and burning have all been released to the barbarous past. Who remembers when a dime worth of bad whiskey made a dollar's worth of good tonic? The open window and the open grate, these are the things that ventilate. There is more danger in the average steam-heated office than in the storm-swept field. When you're coughing, when you're sneezing— And your nose is like the beet; Stay away from Sabbath service. Put the mustard to your feet. Spraying your nose to prevent the flu is like throwing a monkey wrench into the machinery to prevent a break. DUTCH BULBS HAVE JUST ARRIVED AT Highway Bulb Gardens HYACINTHS .TULIPS AND NARCISSI, GLADIOLUS BULBS ARE ALSO READY. 2 MI. SO. ON LOS ANGELES ST. PHONE 82R1. "I fastened them steel spurs to the ankles of that fool restless hen, pointing backwards and downwards right behind her heels, and set kind o' digging fashion, and turned her loose. The durned old wretch was hen-minded and therefore she made straight for the flower beds, but every time she'd scratch, them spurs would stick in the ground and cause her to stop forward and she'd walk herself right out of the beds, and she's a-walking yet, somewheres!" A certain musical composer of much talent and popularity—we will call him Jiffers—has a happy appreciation of his own work, as his friends all know, says Harper's. So highly does he estimate Jiffer's compositions that some of his friends were much startled the other day when he said gravelly: Did you ever notice that the names of all the great composers begin with M?" "M! ejaculated his astonished audience." "Yes, M," said the composer. "Mozart, Mendelsohn, Meyerbeer, Moszkowski—and Me!" The Sunday school teacher had been telling a story of spring, and the miracle of the growth of the Easter lily, says Judge. "Now, children," she said, "who can tell me what it is that makes the lily spring from this little bulb?" "God does it," said one little boy. Frantically our Bobby raised his hand, and shouted at the top of his lungs. "Fertilizer helps!" TUESDAY, OCT. TWENTY-THIRD, 1923 Subscription Rate—In No. Orange-co., per Yr. $3; 6 Months, $1.75. Entered at the Postoffice at Anaheim, Calif., as 2nd class matter. ON THE SPUR OF THE MOMENT QUESTIONS MY BOOK OF ETIQUETTE DOESN'T ANSWER With which hand should the napkin be tucked under the collar? Is it correct to remove small pieces of yeast from home brew before sampling it? What side of the napkin should be used for wiping the silverware? What kinds of nuts should be cracked with the teeth? Is it proper to drop the shells on the floor? Where should one place his spoon in the grapefruit when trying to avoid hitting the hostess. To whom should complaint be made when your neighbor spills soup on your trousers? What is the correct angle which the elbow should make with the forearm when resting the elbow on the table? Under what conditions may the ends of matches be used as toothpicks? If the gravity served does not match your vest what precautions should be taken?—Voo Doo. Judging by the music we hear around our block of apartment houses along toward midnight, somebody has put a lot of harm in harmony. Europe is laboring under a heavy handicap in that she must pay up for her last war before she can have another. CONFESSIONS OF A CYNIC I like to go to the movies because I can sit there in the dark and concentrate on my business troubles. I know it is not just the way to feel, but, somehow, I don't care a darn who the Prince of Wales is married to or whether he is married at all. I would just as soon spend my life on a farm if I could take the city's conveniences and amusements along with me. I do not envy the people who go South for the winter because I do not figure that two or three weeks of cold weather will do me any harm. I would be glad to be one of ten men to go through the cafes and take the cigarettes away from the ladies, and I feel perfectly safe in making this offer as I know I will never find the other nine men. I have never seen a suburb that looked as good as my friends who lived there said it would look. I don't believe I will ever see a style that will be so ridiculous that no woman will adopt it. I know it is not just the way to feel, but something darn who the Prince of Wales is married to or whether he is married at all. I would just as soon spend my life on a farm if I could take the city's conveniences and amusements along with me. I do not envy the people who go South for the winter because I do not figure that two or three weeks of cold weather will do me any harm. I would be glad to be one of ten men to go through the cafes and take the cigarettes away from the ladies, and I feel perfectly safe in making this offer as I know I will never find the other nine men. I have never seen a suburb that looked as good as my friends who lived there said it would look. I don't believe I will ever see a style that will be so ridiculous that no woman will adopt it. I have tried for several years to find out why a banquet speaker thinks he has got to tell stories, but nobody has been able to throw any light on the subject. I believe I am by this time sufficiently stoked up on the Stokes lawsuits. I once thought that the way to make lasting friendships was to do favors for people, but I have had that theory knocked into a cocked hat several times. Comes in the morning mail a note from our long-time friend John Philip Sousa inclosing a clipping which tells of a young man rescuing a young lady from the sad sea waves and going on to state that the young woman married the hero next day. "And," concludes John Philip, "that's a heck of a way to repay a man for saving one's life." A New York headline says: "Woman Is Arrested for Keeping Still." There are a lot of them who couldn't be arrested for that. OUR TIPS TO INVESTORS If John D. Rockefeller whispered in your ear to buy Standard Oil of Indiana—that he had confidence in the stock—that it was worth lots more money—wouldn't you buy it? If Charles M. Schwab slipped you a confidential line on Bethlehem Steel saying it was worth more money—wouldn't you buy it? Suppose Mr. Guggenheim gave you a name of a copper stock that he was willing to buy himself—wouldn't you follow him? Of course you would, provided you had the money.—C. T. M. The Turk will soon be called the Slick Man of Europe. And speaking of John Philip and other noted bandmasters and orchestra conductors, we have often wondered if these men wear their medals on their pajamas when they retire for the night. We expect no answer. BEAUTY She sits on the back of the observation car. The road runs close by the water's edge, Where the slumbrous mountains are mirrored. A mountain stream, white as her neck, From the sky descending, ledge to ledge, Makes a cool sound. The slopes of the mountains are wooded green, Where the sunset casts purple shadows. At the end of the valley The sunlight flashes on a snow-capped peak, Presiding, like a hoary deity, With a bit of golden cloud for a halo, vation car, She sits on the back of the observer. Her head buried deep in the pages of a magazine, The title of which is "Beauty" —Goblin. One of the lady writers informs the world that she shelks in this country are all imitations. They only make a gesture toward shelking. They don't know the game. They are fakes. Well, what can you expect? With the country full of modern women a man has as much of a chance to pull the shelk stuff as he has to buy an old-fashioned cocktail. Even the Aslatic and African shelks are being forced out of the game. A man who starts any caveman stuff these days must have more courage than any modern man possesses. If all the jazz bands in this country should play at once they would make a noise that would not be worth listening to. One of the lady writers informs the world that the sheiks in this country are all limitations. They only make a gesture toward shelling. They don't know the game. They are fakes. Well, what can you expect? With the country full of modern women a man has as much of a chance to pull the sheik stuff as he has to buy an old-fashioned cocktail. Even the Aslatic and African sheiks are being forced out of the game. A man who starts any caveman stuff these days must have more courage than any modern man possesses. If all the jazz bands in this country should play at once they would make a noise that would not be worth listening to. Man in a New York restaurant the other day broke a tooth on a jade earring. It should be explained that the earring was in the chicken salad. It is not yet customary to try to blite ladies even in New York restaurants. Many a "self-made man" forgets to put in the yeast, so he doesn't rise. A column conductor doesn't have such a hard time, at that. He has only to conduct the column. He doesn't have to read it. Loma Vista Memorial Park Cemetery ESTABLISHED 1914 Endowed for Perpetual Maintenance Loma Vista is the only Cemetery in Northern Orange County that is endowed for perpetual upkeep CONTINENTAL MAUSOLEUM CO. —FULLERTON— DIRECTORS—L. S. Himes, President; B. F. Pinson, Vice President; F. E. Proud, F. C. Rimpau, Argus Adams BUSINESS OFFICE—$ Standard Bank Bidg. Phone 158 Franklin Howatt, Secretary Don't Forget That The Ever Ready Truck & Transfer Co. Is still able to do your hauling of any description CONTRACT HAULING A SPECIALTY Get Our Price O. J. LINNARTZ, Prop. Residence 211 E. Sycamore St. PHONE 209-M