anaheim-gazette 1931-11-19

THE ANAHEIM GAZETTE HENRY KUGHEL, Editor and Publisher ESTABLISHED 1870 ISSUED EVERY THURSDAY SUBSCRIPTION PER YEAR $2.00 SEX MONTHS 1.00 Entered at the Anaheim, California Postoffice as second-class matter. GREATEST CHARITY DRIVE SINCE THE WAR The whole United States is being stirred by the greatest united charitable effort since the World War. It is a concentrated effort by all philanthropic agencies to cope with the existing problems of unemployment relief. Annually at this season the American public is accustomed to participating in the Red Cross and local community chest drives. This year there must be raised also the vast additional funds needed to feed and clothe and warm millions of unemployed and their families. Under the inspiration of Walter S. Gifford, appointed by President Hoover, all local organizations are conducting their campaign at the same time and all with the same keynote. We shall do well not to think of this in the usual terms of charity. It is so much more! We are actually engaged in a voluntary partial redistribution of the basic necessities, food, clothing and shelter. Most of us have somewhat more than we need; many have far less than the minimum that can sustain life. Granaries are stuffed with surplus grain yet cities lack for bread. Millions of people have built their savings bank deposits to unprecedented heights; yet millions of others cannot pay their rent. Cotton is a drug on the market; yet children have not enough to wear. Coal and oil are overproduced; yet households shiver for lack of fuel. It is a plain case—nay, a tragically complicated case—of oharity. It is so much more! We are actually engaged in a voluntary partial redistribution of the basic necessities, food, clothing and shelter. Most of us have somewhat more than we need; many have far less than the minimum that can sustain life. Granaries are stuffed with surplus grain yet cities lack for bread. Millions of people have built their savings bank deposits to unprecedented heights; yet millions of others cannot pay their rent. Cotton is a drug on the market; yet children have not enough to wear. Coal and oil are overproduced; yet households shiver for lack of fuel. It is a plain case—nay, a tragically complicated case—of breakdown in the distribution of wealth and goods. Surely the American people have the sympathy, the idealism, the humanity, the common sense—call it what you will—to act all together, all for all. The bustle is said to be trying to come back. So are some of the faded-out Hollywood blondes. CHILDREN ON WHEELS The chance of an automobile accident is much greater if the driver is under twenty than when he or she is over thirty, according to statistics compiled by one of the large accident insurance companies. The records of some four million licensed automobile drivers were examined and it was found that by far the highest percentage of accidents occurred when children under age were driving a car. There are still a good many states and communities where very little or no inquiry is made into the qualifications of anyone who wants to drive a car. In the majority of the states today licenses are required, but the examinations and driving tests vary. And there are still a great many places in which any child who is physically able to hang on to the steering wheel and reach the pedals is allowed to drive. Of course, the earlier in life one learns to drive, the more confidence the motorist acquires and the better he or she is likely to be as time goes on. But we think there is a great deal of wisdom in the law which obtains in some states, under which no one under eighteen may be licensed to drive, and then only after a severe road test of ability. In order to learn to drive before applying for a license, young people in states where this law obtains must always have with them on the front seat an experienced licensed driver. There will always be parents who will let their children talk them into taking out the car, whether really fit to drive it or not, and children will always want to get out on the road and "step on it. That is human nature, and it would not be anybody else's concern if people driving cars were not a menace to other motorists and pedestrians. Everyone has an opinion as to when the depression will be over. Here is ours: The depression will be over when the people get tired of it and commence thinking about something else. Sometimes we think that maybe Commodore Perry made a mistake in thawing out the Japanese. DOUGHNUTS Somebody has put forward the suggestion that October of each year should be celebrated as National Doughnut Month. We Everyone has an opinion as to when the depression will be over. Here is ours: The depression will be over when the people get tired of it and commence thinking about something else. Sometimes we think that maybe Commodore Perry made a mistake in thawing out the Japanese. DOUGHNUTS Somebody has put forward the suggestion that October of each year should be celebrated as National Doughnut Month. We say "amen" to that, but we would broaden the proposal a bit by adding November, December, January, February, March, April, May and June. The doughnut is good eating in any of those months. We have even eaten doughnuts in July, August and September without any harmful effect. By all means let us celebrate the doughnut. In most parts of the country the word doughnut means the toothsome delicacy which was first introduced into America by the Dutch settlers of New Amsterdam, who called them "crullers." Away down East in New England the people of the older generation today still call the Dutch crullers "fried cakes" to distinguish them from the original Yankee doughnut, which is made from bread dough, only slightly sweetened, and which resembles the genuine cruller or Dutch doughnut only in being fried in deep fat. These are the doughnuts which the hearty Yankee pioneers used to eat for breakfast, preferably "dunked" in coffee. But they are not the delicacies which most folks have in mind when they think of doughnuts. The genuine cruller is basically different from the Yankee doughnut. The dough from which it is made is much shorter and sweeter, and in its perfection is of a consistency which requires careful handling if it is to be dropped into the frying kettle without losing its shape. The standard shape of the cruller is, now, a hole surrounded by a rim of dough, but the old-fashioned doughnut was composed of a long strip of dough twisted like a section of rope. Indeed, the word doughnut is merely a perversion of "dough-knot." But whatever the shape, whatever the consistency and quality of the ingredients, we say without hesitation that there is no such thing as a bad doughnut. The only thing that can spoil a doughnut, in our opinion, is to sprinkle it with powdered sugar. That makes it into a Frenchified kind of confection which is not only un-American but very difficult to brush off the front of one's vest. The pessimist is the fellow who would substitute the raven for the eagle as the American national emblem. ANADROM GAZETTE Overtaken by Illness Supreme Court Justice Oliver Spendell Holmes, who was 90 in March has had to quit his job severely from an attack of lumbago. All Nations Honor Her Helen Keller, deaf and dumb and blind, still is active in her writings to contribute to the condition of other sufferers. A Royal Pugilist Prince Ned Suhkavasti, of the Royal Slamese family, elected himself to the boxing squad at Prince-ton as his choice of sports. Bruce Barton Looks at Ways of Life WHERE COMMUNISN FALLS DOWN For several reasons I find it difficult to get excited as some of my friends about the threat of Communism. In the first place, we have had universal education in this country for a long time. Nearly all can read and write, and quite a large proportion can think. In the second place, our wealth, though very inequitably distributed, is enjoyed by a far larger proportion of people than has ever been true in any nation before. Millions own homes, and land and stock. Few are entirely satisfied; no one imagines the present social structure ideal, but very few care to risk losing what they have on SWIMMING FOR BABY Swimming should be taught children very early in life, declares Alleen Riggin, Olympic champion. Pacific island children swim before they begin to walk, she asserts, and this is natural because the act of walking is many times more difficult than the act of swimming. "Indeed walking is the hardest task we average humans ever have to learn," she writes in a new book entitled Modern Swimming and Diving. "Walking, you see, is in direct defiance of the natural laws and can be done after the mastery of a fine sense of balance. Swimming is just the opposite. You put a buoyant body on a cushion of water. You don't have to balance against gravity. It's easier to float than it is to sink." Miss Riggin pointed out that the only animals who conjure up any difficulties about learning to swim are the two who have mastered walking upright—man and monkey. Toss any other animal baby into the water and it will swim. Short Essays On Popular Topics THE EARTH THAT WAS By ARTHUR HOLMES British Professor of Geology Continents were once joined together. The rocks tell us that Britain lay near the equator in that far-off time 200,000,000 years ago, and that South Africa and India were then situated near the South Polar Circle. Southern India was covered with a heavy shroud of ice, like Antarctica today, about the time when the cooled fields of North America, British Europe and China were being completed. Great ice sheets must have buried parts of South America, South Africa and Australia at the same time. All this appeared hopelessly explicable until it was suggested that these scattered lands were once joined with Indio into one gigantic continent so situated that the coast of Natal la In the first place, we have had universal education in this country for a long time. Nearly all can read and write, and quite a large proportion can think. In the second place, our wealth, though very inequitably distributed, is enjoyed by a far larger proportion of people than has ever been true in any nation before. Millions own homes, land and stock. Few are entirely satisfied; no one imagines the present social structure ideal, but very few care to risk losing what they have on the vague promise of acquiring more. But there is a third and more fundamental reason. Communism, even if it came, would not continue. Some form of capitalistic society would very rapidly take its place. Here is an interesting illustration. Back in the latter days of Civil War, when it was necessary to draft men for the Northern armies, the Indians of the West thought it a propitious time to revolt. Several regiments of Union soldiers were withdrawn from the front to settle the uprising. A Pennsylvania politician made a suggestion. He said to Abraham Lincoln: "Our Federal military prisons are filled with Southern military prisoners. These boys are young and keen and good fighters, as we have plenty of reason to know. I'll bet that most of them would rather be outdoors fighting the Indians than sitting idly in jail. Why not recruit them into regiments and send them West?" The proposal was adopted and was immediately successful. But this is what happened in one instance, which throws a fine clear light on the practicability of Communism. I quote from my father's Life of Lincoln: "A thousand men were enlisted at Alton, Illinois, and Camp Douglas in Chicago. They left Chicago on two special trains. Each man had in his pocket two hundred dollars bounty in United States greenbacks, and none of them had any other money. During the period of their imprisonment most of them had become habitual card players, if they had not previously been so. It is said that before they reached their destination a very few individuals had the lion's share of the money. Perhaps never before on earth was there so equitable an experiment in the results of starting men out in life on the basis of equal division of property. The equal division appears not to have lasted very long." Life is a battle and a gamble. We can improve the rules, give fairer handicaps to the less favored, and make the game more humane. But we can't alter the fundamentals of human nature. Communism tries to do that, and Communism will always fall. The U.S. postoffice department has decided to use cotton twine instead of jute twine for tying packages of lettuce—of the vanity, over all. Some of the more likely disorders under severe pressure for must alleviate are now on the talk list or not, keep on as conspirators will be able get made a decision. The U.S. postoffice department has decided to use cotton twine instead of jute twine for tying packages of lettuce—of the vanity, over all. In the first place, we have had universal education in this country for a long time. Nearly all can read and write, and quite a large proportion can think. In the second place, our wealth, though very inequitably distributed, is enjoyed by a far larger proportion of people than has ever been true in any nation before. Millions own homes, land and stock. Few are entirely satisfied; no one imagines the present social structure ideal, but very few care to risk losing what they have on the vague promise of acquiring more. But there is a third and more fundamental reason. Communism, even if it came, would not continue. Some form of capitallistic society would very rapidly take its place. Here is an interesting illustration. Back in the latter days of Civil War, when it was necessary to draft men for the Northern armies, the Indians of the West thought it a propitious time to revolt. Several regiments of Union soldiers were withdrawn from the front to settle the uprising. A Pennsylvania politician made a suggestion. He said to Abraham Lincoln: "Our Federal military prisons are filled with Southern military prisoners. These boys are young and keen and good fighters, as we have plenty of reason to know. I'll bet that most of them would rather be outdoors fighting the Indians than sitting idly in jail. Why not recruit them into regiments and send them West?" The proposal was adopted and was immediately successful. But this is what happened in one instance, which throws a fine clear light on the practicability of Communism. I quote from my father's Life of Lincoln: "A thousand men were enlisted at Alton, Illinois, and Camp Douglas in Chicago. They left Chicago on two special trains. Each man had in his pocket two hundred dollars bounty in United States greenbacks, and none of them had any other money. During the period of their imprisonment most of them had become habitual card players, if they had not previously been so. It is said that before they reached their destination a very few individuals had the lion's share of the money. Perhaps never before on earth was there so equitable an experiment in the results of starting men out in life on the basis of equal division of property. The equal division appears not to have lasted very long." Life is a battle and a gamble. We can improve the rules, give fairer handicaps to the less favored, and make the game more humane. But we can't alter the fundamentals of human nature. Communism tries to do that, and Communism will always fail. The U.S. postoffice department has decided to use cotton twine instead of jute twine for tying packages of lettuce—of the vanity, over all. Southern India was covered with a heavy shroud of ice, like Antarctica today, about the time when the coalfields of North America, Brittle Europe and China were being completed. Great ice sheets must have buried parts of South America, South Africa and Australia at the same time. All this appeared hopelessly in explicable until it was suggested that these scattered lands were once joined with Indio into one gigantic continent so situated that the coast of Natal land near the South Pole. The North Pole must then have been in the Pacific, where, unfortunately its ice cap was unable to leave any records of its existence. The equator in the period can be roughly traced. Cold fields represent relics of the luxurious vegetation that flourished in the tropical swamps of the time. One seems to lose one's identity thus moment the Russian border is crossed—Gene Tunney. A BICYCLIST'S CONSCIENCE A bicycle rider with a conscience strong that he wants to pay gasoline taxes to the state for use of the public highways has been discovered by the California Department of Motor Vehicles. He is C. G. S. Wolfe of Vallejo who taxed himself voluntarily for $1 per hour sent a check for that amount to the department with the explanation that it was "from one who wishes to pay little bit for benefits received." "I have gone about 4200 miles on my bicycle," he explained. "At two cents per gallon tax and a rate of one gallon of gasoline per 100 miles would be 84 cents. But I expect by the first year, if no bad luck occurs, to go mileage that $1 at two cents per gallon would give." Although his motive power is in his legs with which he pumps the bicycle Wolfe said he expected to contribute every year. Unfortunately for Wolfe's conscience, however, there is no authoritative in the law to permit the department accept fees from bicycle riders and returned the check to him. POSTURE FOR PHONE GIRLS Bell system telephone operators taught that the way they sit often has an important bearing upon the clarification and ease of their speech. An operator should be relaxed and comfortable. Her chair must be neither too high nor too low, or it will interfere with her comfort and alternness. She should be seated erect, well against the back of her chair; for if she slid down in the chair, a cramped throne results, her breathing is affected, and she cannot speak so clearly or easily. The mouthpiece of the transmitter should be within about half an inch basis of equal division of property. The equal division appears not to have lasted very long." Life is a battle and a gamble. We can improve the rules, give fairer handicaps to the less favored, and make the game more humane. But we can't alter the fundamentals of human nature. Communism tries to do that, and Communism will always fall. The U.S. postoffice department has decided to use cotton twine instead of jute twine for tying packages of letters. It uses about 3,000,000 pounds a year. The largest United States government private branch telephone exchange outside of Washington, D.C., is now located in the newly completed Federal building in Denver, Colo. It serves both the Federal building and the Postoffice building nearby. It is also the largest private branch exchange board in Denver, with the exception of the one used in the offices of the Mountain States Telephone Co. An average cow needs about 116 cubic feet of air each hour, or about 200 pounds of air every day. WHAT ARE YOU DRAWING BUD? CANT YA SEE, I'M DRAWING A HORSE AN' WAGON! THATS A GOOD HORSE, BUT WHERE'S THE WAGON? AW, THE HORSE'LL DRAW THAT! OBSERVATIONS CALLING ON YOURSELF WHEN YOU AIN'T THERE In a town in another county it is reported two policemen were arrested charged with operating a still. Of course if they took that up it perhaps was for the purpose to help pay for the groceries. And if they made good stuff they no doubt had ready customers who knew all the recognition signs, such as winking the left eye, the beckoning nod of the head and pointing the thumb over the right shoulder. Yet again had the two cops raided the joint they would find themselves coming out before they went in. The landlady spilled the beans and the cops are not pounding the beats anymore. It may require the services of a servant to determine whether the cops are positive or negative. And in the event of a delivery, had the cops endeavored to halt the still owners, had shots been fired one or the other or perhaps both would be hit in the transpartability between the barn and the woodshed. Say, pard, lets have another coke before you scram. HEY, WATSON, HERE'S A CASE FOR YOU A dark and deep mystery surrounds the high jacking of a lot of likker that was reported missing from the storeroom of a D. A. up in a town in another county. A number of Shylocks with spy glasses and everythin' are working on the case and it is said arrests will be made in the next twenty-four hours or a little later. Of course if it was in the wood the liquids may have evaporated, and if it was of the brewery brand the corks may have blown out. But in that event the sleuths would have known it because then it makes a noise like a Chinese fourth of July. Anyway in checking over the goods when taking stock it was made known that some of the bottles were not where they used to be. GETTING THINGS STRAIGHTENED OUT Now and for sometime back we have had many millionaires and a great many paupers. Then there are the classes in between. Some of these have good jobs and get along all right. And there are many of another class who like to live good but they have not the jobs and don't know how to earn the money. That makes them dangerous. And there is a certain other class who have not much at all—but who don't like to work. They should go out and get an acre or two somehow or other and earn enough on the place to live on. They could raise enough at least to live right. Raise corn and beans and potatoes. Of course the millionaires could loosen up their purse strings and go in for good substantial improvements, thereby helping the poor classes. If the rich follows we keep money simulating... Now and for sometime back we have had many millionaires and a great many paupers. Then there are the classes in between. Some of these have good jobs and get along all right. And there are many of another class who like to live good but they have not the jobs and don't know how to earn the money. That makes them dangerous. And there is a certain other class who have not much at all—but who don't like to work. They should go out and get an acre or two somehow or other and earn enough on the place to live. They could raise enough at least to live right. Raise corn and beans and potatoes. Of course the millionaires could loosen up their purse strings and go in for good substantial improvements, thereby helping the poor classes. If the rich fellows would keep money circulating there wouldn't be any hard times. But the thing to do is to get the multi-millionaires to look at it that way. Lots of good money is lost foolishly. If every dollar of public money was ussed right this country would be a regular bee hive. JUST ONE DERNED THING AFTER ANOTHER In the big cities the police radio cars are putting a dent in the bandit business to beat the band. But it keeps the taxpayers busy voting bond issues to build more jails. FOREVER BLOWING BUBBLES People go rolling along and land somewhere and when you catch up with them and ask them why they came they tell you they are be . . . if they know. You ask them how things are out their way and they tell you it's not so good and they complain and blame it onto the administration. Give some of those fellers ten bucks a day and they wouldn't save a dollar a week. So what's the use. You might just as well call it a day and let nature take its course. TRUER WORDS WERE NEVER SPOKEN Vice-president Curtis in speaking to a vast audience at the Armistice Day celebration in Los Angeles, solemnly declared: "May the day never come when our army is too small, or our navy too weak to defend these United States." Tremendous applause With malice toward none, as a cherished token; With Charity for all, as the case may be. Friendship ties must not be broken; Peace with all nations across The Sea. KEEPING NOSE TO GRINDSTONE A man with a national reputation took up column writing as a sideline for a year, and the other day announced that he was going to quit in order to give the old dome a rest. There are some country editors who have been writing pieces for twenty years and are still going strong. KNNEW HIS BERMUDAS When a lawyer was trying a case before a jury, he pleaded his cause so well that one of the jurors asked him for one of his cards. And the judge granted a mistrial because he did that. The juror was open minded and he said he didn't mean to do any wrong and only wanted to recommend the attorney to a friend of his who was in a heck of a lot of trouble. FILLING A LONG FELT WANT An actor has just announced to the public that he is going to make another picture. And the good news made a noise like the bursting of a toy balloon. When a lawyer was trying a case before a jury, he pleaded his cause so well that one of the jurors asked him for one of his cards. And the judge granted a mistrial because he did that. The juror was open minded and he said he didn’t mean to do any wrong and only wanted to recommend the attorney to a friend of his who was in a heck of a lot of trouble. FILLING A LONG FELT WANT An actor has just announced to the public that he is going to make another picture. And the good news made a noise like the bursting of a toy balloon. ARE THE DEAD SOON FORGOTTEN? A young man, who has a rich father, ran over three people in a bunch and killed them. He was convicted of manslaughter; but as the daddy paid the heirs of the deceased a goodly sum of money the son was paroled. TOOTIN’ THEIR OWN HORN It is said that in an eastern university 93 percent of the students play the saxaphone; but their neighbors in many cases live in sound proof buildings. GETTING THE NAME IN THE PAPER When they ask an actress to dedicate a building or something, or christen a ship with ginger ale, Uncle Reuben wants to know if that is done as an advertising stunt, or whether it’s just a high hat gesture. THE AYES HAVE IT There awhile back in a sensational case involving three or four rich play boys and a young lady with a foreign accent, the French language was said to have been used promiseuously as follows, to wit: “Parlee Voo, Oui, Oui and Si Si.” While one of the rich ones said he didn’t understand French, he however did not swear in an interpreter. THE LIGHT IN THE WINDOW It is said in another town up the boulevard, quite a number of men once a year go to the hedd man’s window and renew their request for a liquor license, in order to be on hand in case the places are again opened where the sawdust trail leadss up to the keg and the free lunch counter. KEEPING THE BILL COLLECTOR AWAY Speaking of this and that and the late depression it is said a charming actress has been offered 15 thousand dollars a week to go on a vordeville circuit. Hot ziggetty!