anaheim-daily-herald 1921-12-10

HERALD EDITORIALS LEADER OF THE WORLD “In the light of events of the last few weeks, I can no longer couple Great Britain and the United States as equals. I must confess the United States has taken the leadership of the world.” These are the words of Arthur J. Balfour. There is not a living Englishman from whose lips they might have come with greater significance. Balfour is typical of English pride. He has all the patriotism of his class. He is marked by hauteur that is a habit of that class, implying a belief in individual and national superiority. Such a tribute never could have been won from him as a courtesy. It embodies his beliefs. It was definite recognition of human circumstances as this generation has seen them wrought into new proportions and new relationships. To be accorded first place among the nations of the earth is a proud distinction. It is a place hedged about with responsibilities of incalculable moment. Leadership wisely executed, may show the way to peace, prosperity would follow as a matter of course. With the world no longer engaged in war, nor harrassed by thought of war, nor burdened by the cost of preparation for war, its energies could be so turned to production and to culture and education, that the moral and mental complexion of the universe would be changed. When one President sought to establish a League of Nations, it was a tactic recognition of the duty of leadership. When a later President called a conference to deal with the subject of disarmament, it repeated the recognition. The United States had not proclaimed itself leader, but there was an awareness that such was the position it had attained. The announcement had to come When one President sought to establish a League of Nations, it was a tactic recognition of the duty of leadership. When a later President called a conference to deal with the subject of disarmament, it repeated the recognition. The United States had not proclaimed itself leader, but there was an awareness that such was the position it had attained. The announcement had to come from other lands; now it has come. Leadership is more than the mere fact of being rich, strong and resourceful. A nation might have these attributes, and still lack the quality of leadership; might seek to stand aloof, and have none to lead; a mere selfish aggregation of humanity. The signs are that the United States will not waste the opportunity that, under providence, has honored its career. It is strong enough to lead, and it has the will to lead. It can afford to be just, to be generous. Just now it considers an association of powers for purposes all benign. There are discordant voices raised to declare that it should drop all such effort, and look out for itself, letting the others drift; remain prepared to subdue them by force. Compliance with this demand would not be leadership, but shirking; the loss of opportunity, and in the end, failure. THE MATTER OF TITLES A freckled-faced American youngster never objects to being called kid. The chances are that in speaking of himself and his comrades he would say "us kids." Call that same lad a lamb, and there would be as large a riot as he could be capable of inciting. One might have supposed that to be placed among the sheep rather than among the goats, would be construed as a compliment. Never by the small boy, however. Not that he wants to be anybody's goat either. The term "kid" he considers of quite sufficient dignity. Recently a wife complained in court that her husband called her a cow. She protested against this perse. The offense was greatly emphasized by the fact that at the same time the husband was calling her cow, he was calling a woman, wholly outside the domestic circle, his kid. The latter woman appears not to have been displeased. The questions that arise perhaps belong to the domain of psychology. Why should "kid" be acceptable and "lamb" taboo? It is safe to inform a favored one of the gentler sex that she is a kitten, but tell her that she is a cat, and be prepared to run. Perhaps the maturity implied by "cat" is what causes the trouble. However, this could not explain the resentment at being called "cow," for "calf" doubtless would be equally unacceptable. The questions that arise perhaps belong to the domain of psychology. Why should "kid" be acceptable and "lamb" taboo? It is safe to inform a favored one of the gentler sex that she is a kitten, but tell her that she is a cat, and be prepared to run. Perhaps the maturity implied by "cat" is what causes the trouble. However, this could not explain the resentment at being called "cow," for "calf" doubtless would be equally unacceptable. Anybody with nothing else to think about might think about this. The Los Angeles Express is calling attention to the high rates prevailing in eating places. It shows for example that the profit on the humble squash is 2566 per cent. Chicken, the article on which there is a profit of only 220 per cent, has a lonesome record. The patron who eats tomatoes is settling on the basis of 2400 per cent profit to the house; lettuce, 1100; potatoes 1566 per cent. Consumers were aware that they were being "touched," but the magnitude of the touch will surprise them. Ellis Transfer & Moving LOCAL AND LONG DISTANCE HAULING 119 E. Center St. Phone 310J Herman Strandt 1104 West Center Street All kinds of Cement Work. Prices reasonable. Work Guaranteed. Anaheim Sanitary Dairy Phone 268M Fresh Milk Delivered QUARTS 15c: PINTS Re Morning and evening delivery Imperial Valley, has a heavy date crop. KEEPING UP WITH THE JONEY BRING ME CLUB SANDWATER AN A GLASS ER-ER-ER YOU KNOW Between Ourselfs By Della M. Stewart An odd story is going the rounds of the press concerning the New Jersey woman who felt that her husband, because of his constant fault finding, no longer loved her, and determined to rid him of her presence. Leaving her once happy home, she left a note telling him of her decision and ended the note with a woman's postscript: "You will find your soup in the oven." She hadn't ceased to care for his stomach's welfare. It wasn't the work that caused her to leave. At the very last, with spirit crying out for a adjustment of life, she had thought of material comfort for him. Of course this probably was just the result of habit, but what did the habit indicate? Effort to do her share, kindness of thought, fair dealings. Just where did the break between this and endurance come? Foolish to try to fathom? Maybe. But so many domestic difficulties hinge on such small things. Don't they? So many more domestic battles are fought concerning the little failings of one or the other, the little readjustments of family machinery. What is it that makes living together possible or impossible for a couple? Of course there are major causes at times. But how often it is that minor incidents stretch patience to the breaking point! It seems tragic for two human souls to quarrel because the coffee isn't to the liking, or because John will leave his cigar ashes on the library table, or because Mary fidgets while the evening paper is being read. Out of such infinitesimal causes grow the rifts in harmony that shatter the sweetest of dreams. Why not "remember the soup" instead? Mister Guido Paeirie wich had 1 thousand gallons of wine an brandy for jackasses wich was rested an Judge Cox made him pay $9 hunderd dollars to him to run the county or else stay in jale for 900 days is in jale yet but I dont gess he wood stay thare 900 days cause that wood be near three yeers. I gess he will get out for Christmuss maybe if his customers dont find him home an wunder ware is he. Mister Jackson wich is the shariff he dumped the hull bizness over bored sum wares. Itaint brandy for jackasses whats little mules its for jackasses whats jackasses enuff to drink it Mister Clyde Butler sed whats up in the city hall workin engineerin whatwares glasses. jim dash Fare an warmer an Mister Montgomery nose whats he goin to get for Christmuss up to the Crown stage office an he cood hardly wate he sed. jim dash Mister Goff wich is bookkeeper for the Elks sed they wood have thare first meetin in the new club house next Wednesday nite wich is the 14th. I gess sumbuddy will ride the gote that nite less the gote sees him cummin an rides him sted of him ridin the gote like it did in the Masons when my father wus nishlated. Gotesaint wild animals the yame tane animals only they get mad when you tease them an pull thare tales. jim dash Mister Price un to the city hall sed that wus a good joke a bout Frank Goodrich havin a berthday party with Mister Capt. Watter Amstutz. Mister Price sed he nose it wusnt Mister Goodriches berthday cause he nose when he wus born an its in April the first day of the month wich is April's fool's day. He sed Mister Goodrich got a lot of berthday presunts under fals pretenshuns. jim dash Hazel Withree had a berthday wich was a supprise. They all tuck sum tea towls an put her nishuls on them an give them to Hazel when they went home. They wusst like the towls wich Mister Victor LaMont got swiped up to the Clonial partmuns wun time when Mister Bill Goodrum got his shirt swiped also. jim dash Mister Harry Riley sed they wus more Stew D. Baker autos made this year than any car sept the Ford an he sed that wus cause the Stew D. Baker is a bigger car than the Ford an it takes longer to make it an Fords here he sed Mister Riley is crazy with the prickly heet if he thinks Fords aint jesses hard to make as Stew D. Bakers. They are frends jeess the same. jim dash Mister Louis Danz what thinks of music an Mister Woitke what wus in the dog fite that time down by Mister Helling's cigar stand a long time ago when the brown dog an the black dog had a fite an a fox tarrier butted in an got licked also an Mister Dunham an Mister Knipe is all potners now an its the Orange county music co. They sell peanners an phonografts an things like that an sheets music an evrythink. The cheef sed I shood give them a good rite up. The black dog wus the wun wich is got a broke leg an he limps a round but he can fite good just the same. Nobuddy wus hurt. — thirty — Snap Shots By Henry James Forest fire is the only thing that ever invaded the Malibu ranch without encountering a court injunction. The government will aid corn growers. Happily it may intend to help them get such a price for the product that they will refrain from using corn as fuel. When American restaurant prices were translated into francs, they fairly spoiled the appetite of M. Briand. In "No Accident" week, an accident could be considered nothing less than contempt of public opinion. If Gardner thinks he can put that insanity dodge across there really must be a quirk in his mind. More than 40,000 phones have been installed in Los Angeles in three years, and yet the chances are that anybody calling any of them will get the busy buzz. A doctor says that the remedial value of liquor is psychological, which seems not to discredit it utterly. Probably the most serious fault to be found with the presidential message will be its use of the useless word normalcy. "No accident week" started out with smashes to prove that it had failed to catch the spirit of the occasion. Perhaps the creator of Wallingford takes it as a compliment that every successful swindler on a large scale is mentioned as a Wallingford. If the Irish situation prevents Lloyd George from visiting this country the interest excited here is not likely to be all friendly. The wife of a Scotch farmer had a tongue that cut like a knife. One day the minister passed the farmstead and noticed the farmer standing calmly in midst of a heavy downpour of rain. "Why on earth don't you get indoors?" he queried. "Oh, sir, it's all right," replied the farmer; "I'm sheltering frae the storm. Man, I tell ye it's naething outside tae what it is inside." The mother was sitting on a park min an rides him sted of him ridin the gote like it did in the Masons when my father wus nishiated. Gotesaint wild animals the yare tame animuls only they get mad when you tease them an pull thare tales. jim dash Mister Price up to the city hall sed that was a good joke a bout Frank Goodrich havin a berriday party with Mister Capt. Watter Amstutz. Mister Price sed he nose it wusnt Mister Goodriches berthday cause he nose when he wus born an its in April the when the brown dog an the black dog had a fite an a fox terrier butted in an got licked also an Mister Dunham an Mister Knipe is all potners now an its the Orange county music co. They sell peanners an phonografts an things like that an skins music an eyrythink. The cheef sed I shood give them a good rite up. The black dog wus the wun wich is got a broke leg an he limps a round but he can fite good just the same. Nobuddy wus hurt. — thirty — Little Stories for Bedtime By THORNTON W. BURGESS (Copyright by J. G. Lloyd) CHATTERER LISTENS TO THE SMALL VOICE THE very first of the little mesdow and forest people to see Chatterer the Red Squirrel after he had safely reached the Old Orchard was Tommy Tit the Chickadee. It just happened that Tommy was very busy in the very apple tree in which was the old home of Drummer the Woodpecker when Chatterer reached it. You know, Chatterer had moved into it for the winter just a little while before he had been caught in the corn crib by Farmer Brown's boy. Yes, sir, Tommy was very busy indeed. He was so busy that sharp as his bright little eyes are he had not seen Chatterer racing along the snow-covered old stone wall. It wasn't until he heard Chatterer's claws on the trunk of the apple tree that Tommy saw him at all. Then he was so surprised that he lost his balance and almost turned a somersault in the air before he caught another twig. You see, he knew all about Chatterer and how he had been kept a prisoner by Farmer Brown's boy. "Why! Whyye-e! Is this really you, Chatterer?" he exclaimed. "How ever did you get out of your prison? I'm glad, ever and ever so glad that you got away." Chatterer flirted his tail in the saucy way he has, and his eyes twinkled. Here was just the best chance ever to boast and brag. He could tell Tommy Tit how smart he had been—smart enough to get away from Farmer Brown's boy. Tommy Tit would tell the other little people and then everybody would think him just as smart as Unc' Billy Possum, and you know Unc' Billy really was smart enough to get away from Farmer Brown's boy after being caught. Everybody knew that Chatterer had been a prisoner, and now that he was free everybody would believe whatever he told them about how he got away. Was there ever such a chance to make his friends and neighbors small voice that made Chatterer hesitate and stop. "You don't mean to say that you were smart enough to fool Farmer Brown's Boy and get out of that stout little prison he made for you, do you?" asked Tommy Tit. "No," replied Chatterer almost before he thought. "No, I didn't. The fact is, Tommy Tit, he left the door open purposely. He let me go. Farmer Brown's Boy isn't half so bad as some people think." "Dee, dee, dee," iaughed Tommy Tit. I've been telling a lot of你 fellows that for a long time, but none of you would believe me. Now I guess you know it. Why, I'm not the least bit afraid of Farmer Brown's Boy—not the least little bit in the world. If all the little forest and meadow people would only trust him instead of running away from him, he would be the very best friend we have." "Perhaps so," replied Chatterer, doubtfully. He was very good to me when I was in is prison end—and I'm not so very much afraid of him now. Just the same, I don't mean to let him get hands on me again." "Pooh." said Tommy Tit. "Pooh-I'd just as soon eat out of his hand." "That's all very well for you to say when you're flying around free, but I don't believe you dare go up to his house and prove it," retorted Chatterer. "Can't now," replied Tommy. "I've got too much to do for him right now, but some day I'll show you Dee, dee, chickadee! I'm wasting my time talking when there is such a lot to be done. You didn't know that Farmer Brown's Boy and I are partners, did you?" Next Story: The Queerest Kind of Partners. A young golfer, a hopeless novice possessed good intentions. His job after joining a golf club was no to study the game, but to study the The wife of a Scotch farmer had a tongue that cut like a knife. One day the minister passed the farm-stead and noticed the farmer standing calmly in midst of a heavy down-pour of rain. "Why on earth don't you get indoors?" he queried. "Oh, sir, it's all right," replied the farmer; "I'm sheltering free the storm. Man, I tell ye it's nothing outside tae what it is inside." The mother was sitting on a park seat. Her small son began an argument with another youth. "Who're yer punchin' of?" he demanded trucuiently. "Tommy," said the shocked parent. "Your grammar! You should have said, 'Of whom are you punching?'" We read that passage to a bank clerk the other morning. "Aw cut that dialect stuff and get down to English," he said. "Don't you know Chaucer?" we demanded. "Say," he replied, "Dy'a think I know every guy who has an account here?" could tell Tommy Tit how smart he had been—smart enough to get away from Farmer Brown's boy. Tommy Tit would tell the other little people, and then everybody would think him just as smart as Unc' Billy Possum, and you know Unc' Billy really was smart enough to get away from Farmer Brown's boy after being caught. Everybody knew that Chatterer had been a prisoner, and now that he was free everybody would believe whatever he told them about how he got away. Was there ever such a chance to make his friends and neighbors say, "What a smart fellow he is." "I-I——" Chatterer stopped. Then he began again. "You see, it was this way: I-I——" Somehow Chatterer couldn't say what he had meant to ray. It seemed as if Tommy Tit's bright merry eyes were looking right into his head and heart and could see his very thoughts. Of course they couldn't. The truth, that little small voice inside, which Chatterer had so often refused to listen to when he was tempted to do wrong, was talking again. It was saying: "For shame, Chatterer! Tell the truth. Tell the truth." It was that little got too much to do for him, right now, but some day I'll show you. Dee, dee, chickadee! I'm wasting my time talking when there is such a lot to be done. You didn't know that Farmer Brown's Boy and I are partners, did you? Next Story: The Queerest Kind of Partners. A young golfer, a hopeless novice possessed good intentions. His first job after joining a golf club was not to study the game, but to study the club rules. He was a stickler for obedience. He went round the course alone at first, having no desire to worry his friends with his bad play. When a last tha, saw him returning they were surprised to find that he was wheeling a big wheelbarrow. "What on earth have you go there?" they asked. "Turf," replied the novice. "I'm going to replace it." Romance makes a bee line for the tall timber when a man begins to referee to his wife as the "old woman." Saturday, December 10, 1921. HERALD SUBSCRIPTION RATES One Month by Carrier...$ .65 One Year by Mail...$4.00 One Month by Mall...$ .40 Entered at the Postoffice at Anaheim, California, as second-class matter. THE ONCE OVER By H. I. PHILLIPS CULTURAL BACKGROUNDBANK CLERKS AND THE A bank clerk should never, no never, be rough— He should hold to good manners quite tightly; When a stranger requests some hard cash, don't be gruff; Always say, "Help yourself," politely. The demand of the hour in the bank clerk market is for clerks who are ultra-cultured. The day of the tart, port, and even snappy clerk is at an end. So sayeth the vice-president of one of the country's largest banking institutions, sounding the need of a cultural background as a part of every bank clerk's equipment. Which is as it should be. Bank clerks are notoriously rude. It is hard enough for a man to go into a bank where he has no money and ask for some without being refused grufully. Most of us have reached the point where we don't mind being turned down, but we do object to the lack of courtesy. "Will you please cash my check for $100, my dear sir?" the applicant should ask. "May I, without offense, inquire if you have any money here, sir?" the courteous clerk should reply. "I pains me to say, thank you, that I haven't a nickel in this or any other bank," the applicant should reply. "I'm awfully sorry, sir," the clerk should answer (if he has any cultural background at all), "and it gives me great pain to be unable to accommodate you, but the fact is, my dear sir, in the words of Kents: 'He who asks for funds without a quid, asketh a thing that can't be did.'" "I thank you just the same and bid you, if I may, a polite and affectionate good day," the applicant should reply. Having no funds here I felt I wouldn't get any from you...my idea was to see if you had a cultural background. S'long." It is the claim of the bank officials who sound the new demand that bank clerks should study the works of the old English masters. "They should read every morning a passage from Chaucer's 'Canterbury Tales,'" the official says. "If they would read such a passage as 'When that Aprille with his shoures soot the drought of March hath perced to the roote' they could not fail to sense the beauty of language." Have a Smile A man went to order a wedding cake the other day. "I'm getting married," he said to the girl in the bakery, "and I want a cake." "Well, it's the latest thing!" said the girl, "to have wedding cakes in harmony with the bridegroom's calling or profession. Thus, a musician has an oat cake, an athlete a cup cake, a man who borrows money from his friends a sponge cake, and so forth, and so on. What is your calling, please?" "I'm a pianist." answered the happy young man. "Then, of course," said the girl, "you'll want a pound cake?" "O. I'm in such a perspiration!" cried a high school girl as she fanned herself with her tennis racquet. "Miss Frankland," rebuked the "dog an the black dog fox carter butted in so an Mister Dunham is all potners now an county music co. They an phonografts an an sheets music an cheef sed I shood rite up. The black wich is got a broke a round but he can e same. Nobuddy wus thirty — "It pains me to say, thank you, that I haven't a nickel in this or any other bank," the applicant should reply. "I'm awfully sorry, sir," the clerk should answer (if he has any cultural background at all), "and it gives me great pain to be unable to accommodate you, but the fact is, my dear sir, in the words of Kents: 'He who asks for funds without a quid, asketh a thing that can't be did.'" "I thank you just the same and bid you, if I may, a polite and affectionate good day," the applicant should reply. "Don't mention it," the Cultural Background should return, "and I assure you that if at any time you should deposit any money in this bank I will be very pleased to honor your check for any part of it. Remember me to all the folks. And I hope I have not offended you." "Not at all. 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